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Mandrill Mojo

Great great aunt Sallie is so in love with uncle Miles that she is cooking all of his favorite food while wearing an elegant pink ball gown, complete with sequins and a hilarious white boa hung around her neck. Uncle Miles is coming down the dirt road driving his red Cadillac, top down, with a live mandrill perched up front like a gigantic freaky hood ornament.

Mandrill woman tells me that she’s sticky all over from eating dripping, juicy, mangos while whispering magic potion instructions to uncle Miles. Mandrill woman is raw, untamable, and a threat. I ask uncle Miles about this and he says I am not old enough to know about his “monkey business.”

Aunt Sallie is not concerned about this powerful temptress and confesses that mandrill woman is actually working for auntie’s agenda of getting uncle in a raucous and raunchy mood for the evening she has planned.